I’m nowhere near perfect and why you need to know this


A few years ago, a close friend of mine came over to my place for a visit, and happened to wander in to my bedroom. Peering into my wardrobe she loudly exclaimed, “My gooooosh, I didn’t expect this!”.

“Expect what?” I asked her, wondering if she’d spotted dirty underwear or an errant sex toy. “I didn’t think that it would be so… unorganised.” I laughed, assuring her that there were a lot of things that weren’t organised in my life (well, in the days before I discovered Marie Kondo *wink*) and I certainly wasn’t perfect. She responded “Hmm, it’s just surprising to me.”

And yes I probably don’t SHOW the mess so much. But it’s definitely there.


The other day I was flicking through some old journals to get some perspective of what things have been like for me, mentally, emotionally and spiritually over the years. And my gosh, the painful dark and messy places I have been! The torment that poured out of my heart and on to those ink-soaked pages is not pleasant to re-live. It’s a confronting thing for an empath (who feels so keenly) to go back and read previous journal entries that express so much pain – I’m immediately sucked in to the vortex of experiencing that exact tonal vibration within my body, and let me tell you – the elevator goes rapidly down several floors.

Want to know about some of the feeling states I found in those pages? Short of publishing the pages verbatim (which I may do one day, in my book) they can be described as:

  • Feeling completely cut off from love, light and connection.
  • Being tossed around by other people’s emotions and not knowing how to effectively care for my empath self.
  • Feeling forgotten by the universe, abandoned, left behind, lost, bereft of any kind of energetic lifeline to my highest potential.
  • Being thoroughly depleted, exhausted, too tired and overwhelmed to move in the direction of my dreams and soul purpose.
  • The painful frustration of procrastinating like a freaking PRO.
  • Flailing around always looking for EXTERNAL validation.
  • Thinking I had ZERO knowledge of what my purpose was in this world.
  • Worrying I was doing everything wrong.
  • Suffering from severe skin-crawling comparisonitis.
  • Second-guessing myself all the time and thinking I needed to people please first before I considered my own needs.

If I could go back in time, I would energetically put my arms around that frightened young woman, take her by the hand, look in to her eyes and tell her this:

  • This is all in service of your higher path. Even the pain. Especially the pain. You need to plumb these depths because the story of your healing becomes your work. It alchemises into soul work you are meant to bring into this world and share and help people with. You need to GO THROUGH it in order to be able to know in your bones that you can help others traverse the same.
  • Your commitment to your energy work is going to pay off in dividends you cannot even dream. The connection and joy you will feel is indescribable. Stick with it, be disciplined about it, and you will reap MASSIVE benefits.
  • The journey from your head to your heart is the most important one you’ll ever make. Living from your heart connects you to an intelligence, wisdom and energy that is a treasure trove you can call upon anytime.
  • Get the inside sorted and the outside falls in to place (this one’s a work in progress and will take daily reminders).
  • The sooner you commit to your soul purpose, the sooner the life of your wildest dreams comes in.
  • Developing your intuition is super important. Get out of your head and into a feeling state, to access your higher wisdom.
  • Radical self care, love and compassion are the foundation upon which your best, most exalted self will be born.
  • Society at large is a bit nuts (seriously). Don’t buy into the so-called ducks you need to get lined up by a certain time in order to be seen as ‘successful’. There are many crazy people out there who so-called ‘have it all’ but feel completely desolate inside. You do not want to be them. Your soul is calling for majesty and mastery in its purpose.

The reality I live nowadays – feeling connected to source energy, with my energy centres open and humming, firmly embodying my soul purpose, revelling in my femininity, which lives (most of the time) in symbiosis with my inner masculine (when my masculine and mind-oriented self used to completely run the show) is obviously a far cry from what reality used to feel like for me. Don’t get me wrong, I can and do still feel the darkness and difficulty often – but the key is that I now know how to DANCE with it, and feel my way back into my connected, exalted state.

Why do I feel the need to make sure YOU know about where I’ve been? Because I don’t want you to think that I’m sharing here or mentoring from a place of constant mental, emotional, and spiritual perfection. It has been and always will be a bit messy. But it’s a beautiful mess. The reason I am so good at what I do (and can really own my value in this) is because I’ve BEEN where my clients have been and I know how to move through it now with a lot less meandering and getting off track. And very honestly, why would you want to listen to, much less work with, a person who has no idea how to get from where you are to where you want to go?

I’m not the person on the other side of the river bank shouting at you to just, ‘Come on over here! It’s really great once you arrive!’, I wade back through the water, skip on stepping stones, and come to stand by your side. And then, linking arms, we make our way together, to the other river bank.

I’ve poured my heart and soul into designing my signature three month mentoring program that I wish I could have had access to a few years ago, while I was blindly flailing about trying to find my way through a raging river of fear and on to the verdant banks of authentic self love, spiritual connection and soul purpose. My aim with my mentoring program is to arm my clients with tried and true practices I have honed after years of trial and error, mindset shifts, heart-based activations and embodied practice.

I blend the spiritual and the practical in a way that GETS RESULTS, like the following experienced by my clients:

  • Establishing a spiritual practice that actually works
  • Completely dropping destructive negative self talk patterns
  • Aligning with their divine, goddess selves
  • Crystal clear clarity around their soul purpose
  • Shifting from a lack mentality to one of over-flowing abundance
  • Raising their vibrational frequency to align with their highest potential
  • Complete connection with themselves
  • Transformational shifts in to self love
  • Fully integrating divine feminine practices into their daily lives
  • Established self care patterns for their empathic nature
  • Moving from their heads to the hearts, and living an embodied life (that feels AMAZING) every day

I am so lit up by the results my clients get, and continue to get, in my one-on-one work with them. I am so very thrilled to be in service to these amazing goddesses.

However, one result I CANNOT guarantee as a result of my mentoring program is a tidy and organised wardrobe. I’ll leave that one to Marie Kondo.

If your heart leaps at the sound of any of this (even slightly!) click on over here to find out more about my private 1:1 spiritual mentoring, or drop me a line at carly@carlystephan.com. I’m opening up a *teeny tiny* few spots for a handful of women for a very short period of time. I have ONE more spot left for the next while, before I get into launch mode for my upcoming eCourse. So if you’re picking up what I’m putting down, I would LOVE to work with you!

If you’re considering taking up my mentoring program but really want to know whether it’s right for you, I’m currently offering 50% off my ‘one off’ 1:1 Private Mentoring sessions – if you book and pay within the next 48 hours. I rarely offer just the one session as my offerings go DEEP – for real lasting transformational change, which takes time to implement and integrate. But if you want a quick intuitive re-juice, a few tips and tricks on how to bring yourself into alignment and connect to your goddess nature –  flick me an email and we’ll get you booked! But these rates are only available until Saturday 16 April, 6pm (AEST).

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