I’d just had the most delicious painful/pleasurable 2-hour bodywork session with my longtime shaman/medicine man Ahren when he threw an insight my way that kinda knocked the wind out of me.
For many years now, despite knowing that I’ve co-created so much of my existence with the help of both seen and unseen grace (friends, family, guides, and the energy of the universe); there’s been a not-insignificant part of me that’s taken a bit of perverse pride in my ability to ‘take care of myself’ – I’ve worn it as a badge of honour – leaving my full-time career in international development, and hitting the ground running with a thriving online business, building and create my literal dream life from the ground up – I DID THAT!
Talk about hashtag #winning.
Well on this day, Ahren gently and firmly called bullsh*t on me, inviting me into a deeper level of awareness around what he saw as my efforting to hold myself, and a thread of incoherence within me that suggested I couldn’t just surrender. I had to ‘make sure I was safe’.
‘It’s safe to let it all go. Drop down, deep into the earth, grow your roots even deeper. Get ugly with it. You’re safe.’
And then this: ‘Trees only grow taller by growing their roots. With a shallow root structure, they’ll topple over. You’re expanding out and reaching so high, you’re being invited to go even deeper within.’
I did a bit of journalling around the root of not trusting 100% that I was safe, without my own efforting and scaffolding – and I realised – it’s not that putting in effort or structure into my life is wrong, bad, or that I need to stop doing it: but that the energy I’m inhabiting whilst doing it is a long-emblazoned, well-worn track in my nervous system that needs re-wilding.
There was a part of me that didn’t quite fully 100% trust that I was held – and the chaos of the world was running this program into overdrive.
I needed to embody the energy of surrender and land in the deep knowing that I am safe, full stop.
And from this place I get to play with whatever structure or effort calls to me, wherever the energy within me is directing me to go.
Over the next several months following this session, life and 2020 dealt me the exact right combination of events to sink me deep into my roots – to unravel my nervous system, even more, to let go, to surrender, to allow myself to be held in the wild ride that we’ve been on for a number of months now.
And as I plumbed deep depths within myself, I knew that so many other soulful leaders, lightworkers and wayshowers around the world were going through simultaneous reckonings within themselves – similar questions of whether it was safe to trust amongst the maelstrom of world events occurring, if it was safe to do the work that’s on their hearts with absolute gusto and conviction, and whether it was safe to surrender to what life is currently serving up to us as a collective?
While diving deep within and uncovering my fair share of gnarliness, demons and more parts of me to love (as Matt Kahn would say!) I excavated some of the most epic gold in the process – important codes all soulful leaders need in these times:
– Leading and lighting up the world can and must still be done in the messy in-between // collective awakening we find ourselves in.
– Trust in the deeper collective awakening – beyond the surface level chaos at play. Don’t even try to control it. Just do your part (what’s on your heart).
– Surrendering to the universe means FOLLOW THE ENERGY of what’s beckoning you and tugging at you for attention. (It does not mean give up.)
– Back yourself and know you are held ESPECIALLY WHEN there is no apparent safety net or evidence that it’s going to work, except for the full soul YES that emanates from you when you consider your legacy.
– Get turned on by the service you’re here to give – not purely to attain some material goal (which of course is FUN, and gets to be present in abundance, but is only fleetingly satiating).
– Know deeply that you’re here to leave a proverbial dent in the universe, a legacy that will outlive you and have ripple effects beyond this time and space. And proceed accordingly.
– Desire for you and your work is a given. It would never have arisen within your heart if it didn’t already have many souls in deep desire for it.
These soulful leader codes and oodles more (seriously these codes are coming out of my pores!) are all coded up into the most powerful, activating, next-level container of growth and transformation I’ve had the pleasure of channeling through me: The STELLARmind – a mastermind for world-shaking, legacy-making Soulful Leaders who are ready to quantum accelerate their mission, amplify their abundance and have interstellar impact. (And a whole heap of freaking FUN!)
I’m so excited to be already held by the energy of this container (it is phenomenal), and I know its also exactly what a very specific kind of woman needs right now – to feel even more emboldened in her mission here on earth. Maybe this woman is you?
AND speaking of codes, I’m dropping juicy lil’ nuggets every day this week over on Instagram Live – 5 Days of 5D – five days of fifth-dimensional business wisdom! So yummy!
If you’re feeling the call, a heart-leap of yes, or that aforementioned ENERGY *wink wink*, may I suggest you follow that impulse, right this way and grab The STELLARmind overview and have a chat with me?
I’m going live at 12pm Brisbane time every day February 8-12 – come join me and let’s vibe up together?